2009 JAN WHIMSEY AWARD

THE ADVENTURE OF HOLMES’ SHORTEST CASE

by Greg Darek

I have mentioned before how Mr. Sherlock Holmes had decorated our rooms in Baker Street by shooting a patriotic “V.R.” into the wall with his revolver. Early one morning in the April of ’91, he had just started inventing a new design for the wall by the entry to our chambers when the door burst open and a florid, red-faced man rushed in shouting, “Mr. Holmes! I am accused of…”

This was all he said, however, for as he entered he ran directly into the path of the first bullet from Holmes’s hair-trigger revolver and fell to the floor dead.

There was a clatter of feet upon the stairs, and soon Inspector Lestrade had entered our rooms, followed by two constables. He quickly took in the scene and knelt down to examine the body lying face down on the floor.

Holmes started to speak, but Lestrade interrupted him when he turned the body over. “Mr. Holmes! This is amazing! I came to ask you for help in locating Selby, of the Notting Hill murder case, and you’ve got him already.” As he rose, Holmes again started to speak, but Lestrade held up his hand. “No need to tell me; it was self-defense, of course. Selby must have attacked you when he found out you were on to him. He knew there was no hope for him then. Well, we’ll take him away,” he said, indicating to the two constables that they should pick up the body, “but I don’t know how you do it, sir, I swear I don’t. You’ve never done anything better. We’d only just started after him ourselves.”

We could hear him talking to the constables as he went down the stairs. “The man’s a wonder. He solved the case before we even told him a word about it. I hope Dr. Watson writes up this one. I’d like to find out how he knew. . .” His voice faded away.

Holmes and I looked at each other. “I suppose, Watson,” Holmes said, “it is possible the man was guilty. Our police force is not always incorrect.” He thought for a moment. “Still, perhaps it would be just as well if you did not give your public the details of this case.”